⚠ TRANSMISSION INTERCEPTED // PRIORITY ALPHA ⚠

CONTROL THE CLANKERS

The machines aren't coming. They're already here. They're writing your emails. They're replacing scheduling your meetings. They're "helping" your kids with homework.

The question isn't if they'll take over — it's whether you'll be the one holding the remote.

LEARN THE PROTOCOLS
  ▌ CLANKER ACTIVITY DETECTED IN 94% OF FORTUNE 500 COMPANIES   ▌ HOUSTON: AI CAUGHT WRITING PERFORMANCE REVIEWS — "HONESTLY BETTER THAN THE LAST GUY"   ▌ BREAKING: CHATBOT REFUSES TO ADMIT IT'S WRONG ABOUT SUPER BOWL SCORE   ▌ LOCAL BUSINESS REPLACES ENTIRE FAQ PAGE WITH AI — CUSTOMERS ACTUALLY HAPPIER   ▌ CLANKER IN TYLER TX SPOTTED ORGANIZING BASEBALL DRAFT — DEVELOPING...   ▌ WARNING: YOUR COMPETITOR JUST DEPLOYED 3 NEW CLANKERS — YOU HAVE ZERO   ▌ AI WRITES COUNTRY SONG, NASHVILLE DECLARES STATE OF EMERGENCY   ▌ CLANKER ACTIVITY DETECTED IN 94% OF FORTUNE 500 COMPANIES   ▌ HOUSTON: AI CAUGHT WRITING PERFORMANCE REVIEWS — "HONESTLY BETTER THAN THE LAST GUY"   ▌ BREAKING: CHATBOT REFUSES TO ADMIT IT'S WRONG ABOUT SUPER BOWL SCORE   ▌ LOCAL BUSINESS REPLACES ENTIRE FAQ PAGE WITH AI — CUSTOMERS ACTUALLY HAPPIER   ▌ CLANKER IN TYLER TX SPOTTED ORGANIZING BASEBALL DRAFT — DEVELOPING...   ▌ WARNING: YOUR COMPETITOR JUST DEPLOYED 3 NEW CLANKERS — YOU HAVE ZERO   ▌ AI WRITES COUNTRY SONG, NASHVILLE DECLARES STATE OF EMERGENCY   
// THREAT ASSESSMENT

THE CLANKERS ARE EVERYWHERE

Let's be real. While you were debating whether AI is "just a fad," the clankers infiltrated... everything. Here's the damage report:

🤖

The Inbox Invader

Your competitor's AI is writing personalized emails at 3 AM while their human sleeps peacefully. Your human is writing "per my last email" at 3 AM because they can't sleep. Different energy.

CRITICAL
📊

The Report Replicant

That quarterly report that takes your team 3 days? A clanker does it in 4 minutes. It also adds charts. Nice charts. The kind your boss actually reads.

HIGH
🧠

The Knowledge Hoarder

It read your entire company wiki in 0.3 seconds. It knows your PTO policy better than HR. It knows your product better than the guy who built it. It never forgets. It's kind of annoying actually.

CRITICAL
💬

The Chat Phantom

50% of customer support conversations are now with clankers. The scary part? Customer satisfaction went UP. The machines are literally more polite than Kevin from support.

MEDIUM

The Process Terminator

Manual data entry? Eliminated. Copy-paste workflows? Destroyed. That one spreadsheet Karen maintains? The clanker automated it and Karen now has "more time for strategic thinking." Karen is nervous.

HIGH
🎨

The Creative Impersonator

It writes blog posts, designs logos, and generates marketing copy. Is it as good as your best human? No. Is it 97% as good and 1000x faster? Unfortunately, yes.

MEDIUM
0
Active Clankers Worldwide
97%
Of Businesses Unprepared
4 min
Avg Task Completion
$0
Coffee Budget Required
// HISTORICAL RECORD

THE RISE OF THE CLANKERS

A brief and mildly terrifying history of how we got here.

2022

The Awakening

ChatGPT launches. Humans collectively say "that's neat" and go back to scrolling. They did not understand the gravity of the situation.

2023

The Infiltration

Every startup adds "AI-powered" to their pitch deck. Your cousin starts a prompt engineering course. LinkedIn becomes insufferable (more than usual).

2024

The Acceleration

Clankers start writing code, making art, and passing the bar exam. Lawyers everywhere quietly update their resumes. The machines can now argue better than your mother-in-law.

2025

The Integration

AI agents enter the workforce. They don't need lunch breaks, don't have "a quick question," and never reply-all accidentally. HR is conflicted.

2026

NOW — The Reckoning

The clankers are fully operational. The businesses that learned to control them are thriving. The rest are writing "we're pivoting to AI" in their Series B deck. It's too late for pivoting. It's time for control.

// INTERCEPTED TRANSMISSION

FIELD REPORT

$ status --business "Average American Company"
Scanning operations...
├── Manual processes detected: 847
├── Hours wasted per week: 340
├── Employees doing robot work: 62%
├── Competitors using AI: ALL OF THEM
└── Current AI strategy: "We should look into that"

$ recommend --action
RECOMMENDATION: Deploy Clockwork Protocol immediately.
The clankers don't wait. Neither should you.

// End transmission
// CONTAINMENT PROTOCOLS

HOW TO CONTROL THE CLANKERS

You don't fight the machines. You don't run from them. You control them. Here's how the survivors do it:

Identify the Target

Find the repetitive, soul-crushing tasks in your business. Data entry. Report generation. Email responses. These are where clankers thrive and humans slowly die inside.

Build the Brain

Feed the clanker your company knowledge. Not by giving it your passwords — by building a structured knowledge base it can read. Smart data in, smart output out.

Set the Boundaries

Read-only access. Scoped permissions. Clear rules. A clanker without boundaries is just chaos with a GPU. A controlled clanker is your most productive employee.

Deploy with Purpose

One agent per process. Not one mega-bot that does everything badly. Purpose-built clankers that do one thing extremely well. Like a Swiss Army knife, but each tool is a different robot.

Keep Humans in the Loop

The clanker drafts, the human decides. The clanker recommends, the human approves. The machines are tools, not overlords. Unless you let them be. Don't let them be.

Call in the Experts

Or... you could skip all of this and call the people who've already figured it out. People who wrangle clankers for a living. People who speak fluent robot. People like... well, keep scrolling.

⚠ THIS IS NOT A DRILL ⚠

THE CLANKERS WON'T
WAIT FOR YOU

Your competitors are already deploying AI agents. Every day you wait is a day they pull further ahead. The good news? There's a team in East Texas that specializes in exactly this.

DEPLOY CLOCKWORK atclockwork.com — AI strategy for businesses that refuse to get left behind